Still trying. Still struggling. Happy one day, sad the next. I need to take control of myself again. I’m not sure where to go from here. I made a few baby steps in the right direction, but its not enough. I wonder if there will be a day when I wake up and I feel a hangover instead of heartache. When I’ll feel hopeful instead of hopeless. When he isn’t the first thing on my mind. I know I’m doing this to myself, but I absolutely can’t help it. It’s sad, I know. But everyone deals/heals in different ways. I’m doing the very best I can.